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10/21/2006 Dance like nobody's watching Dance like nobody's watching; Love like you've never been hurt. Sing like nobody's listening Live like it's heaven on earth. We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire. The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza. He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life". This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have. Treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one... So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until your ship comes in, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy... Happiness is a journey, not a destination. 10/17/2006 So bad luck Again, I took wrong Type30 tube. Why can't I remember I should use those plastic ones instead of the glass?
Everytime when I do the large scale plasmid DNA prep, I feel sick about so many details to consider. Maybe from the very first time when Dr. Watabe taught me to do this experiment, I just felt so much stress on that precious baby vaccum utral centrifuge machine, on all the technique details and on all the talking- about of Dr. Watabe's style-those serious consequences. It's like scary from deep of my heart that there must be some mistake everytime I did this experiment. Actually, I did once and saw once in the past days.
Hope the transferred DNA is OK. It's not comfortable when Sonia transfer them by the large pippet. I wanted to tell her let me do this but I couldn't. Damn it! It's another factor causing my concern that this time I have to work with Sonia.Not all from Rui's worlds. I saw and I knew by my eyes that working with her is absolutely a disaster.
Hope everything is Ok. Whatever, I'll go on to do my best in the following steps even it's not gonna work. Just one more chance to practice.
Fighting! 10/13/2006 Stay in Springfield 消息传的真快啊，忽然间大家都知道我们实验室不参加今年的symposium了；因为瓦老师星期天要去Chicago开会，老人家不能两地奔波，他觉得其他人去也没有意思，所以今年谁都不去了；有点失望，早就听说了这个每年一次几乎就是“度假”的活动，而且今年是在Carbondale啊，真想回去看看。唉，算了，还有那么事情没做呢，省下周末来好好学习也不错。
从Shop'n Save回来，想起今天有Grey's Anatomy。每周一集，也就是美国这样的节奏播电视剧，Friends才能演十年吧！
Burke的手终于好起来了！ 很喜欢这一对，看起来无论性格，经历完全不搭的两个人，在一起竟然使事情变得那么和谐。粗线条的Cristina完全不能体会感情细腻的Burke; 可是有她在身边，再大的困难也能闯过去；这次“枪袭事件”让我发现Burke其实也很脆弱，因为太优秀所以更害怕失败；装出很平静的样子，心里一定害怕的不得了。偏偏Cristina一点也看不出来，那么轻松地说着“you're fine"，似乎一点都不担心Burke的伤势。终于，Burke爆发了，不能在规定的时间内完成手术，对自己完全失去了信心时，Cristina的话在Burke听来完全是嘲讽， "What only I have is the hand, what you only like is Dr. Preston Burke. " 而Cristina只是走到Burke身边，拿起了手术钳，"what if I hold the vein" ……
Izzie还是没有回到医院，这次的伤口太深了。很怀念第一季那个开朗简单的Izzie,有着天使般的好心肠， 生活的艰辛她都挺得过来，从Alex那里受的伤害她也承受得了，可是这次Danny的离去对她的打击太大了。这几集看着Izzie仿佛老了十岁。之前看预告时知道这集里Izzie会从Danny父亲那里得到Danny的留言，Grey's Anatomy从来不是一部励志剧，可以想象这对Izzie意味着什么。很多人都在抨击这样剧情，医生不应该爱上自己的病人。可是她是Izzie啊，爱上了，又有什么办法。所以这就是后果吗？仍然是对Izzie的考验吗？可怜的Izzie，希望她能早点振作起来。
Meredith那边似乎日渐明朗，Derek和Finn,也终于做出了选择；Derek的主动退出倒是成全了Meredith做出决定；其实看了这么多集，答案观众早就很清楚了。何况女主角从来都不是那么轻易向命运妥协的。
第三季开播以来每个人都遇到了不幸的事情，或是遇到要战胜自己的困难，或是要做出艰难的决定；也许编剧是想告诉人们，生活本来就太不容易。所以即使是每周80小时，一年50的星期待在医院里，这些年轻的intern也无法过平静的生活。性格乖张的病人，经历复杂的人生，与生死相关，情感上要做出选择，责任感，自尊心，本能反应，时刻都在较量。游戏似乎有规则，可是没有人的话是完全正确的。Meredith说过一句很经典的话，作为医生，他们需要忽略自己的需要，去满足病人的需求。可是如果真的能做到，这电视也拍不下去了。照顾病人，需要投入感情，可是太投入了，又会影响理智的判断。回想起来，好像除了Geogre和Meredith,都经历了这样的磨练。Izzie经历的最残酷，这三季里也是她变化最大。人都是需要成长的吧，何况还是这么不好当的医生，可是，过程一定要这么痛苦吗?
10/10/2006 考完试啦 终于考完Mole Onco啦！！！
 强烈抗议！考了那么多paper的问题，8章书竟然都没怎么考！下次不能再这么复习了！还有心得就是：多看paper真是好处多多呀！那些实验设计问题没有一些底子是答不好的。平时自己读文章的时候没有发现那么多问题，现在看到了相关的题目，仿佛有人醍醐灌顶般一下想明白了很多事情。所以以后还是要努力地读文章，听seminar！
可是还不能松懈，明天还有Biochem的quiz，下周要交Review Progress, 要开始准备Seminar和Journal club的Presentation了。
不知道Rui以前是怎么能做完实验回来看动画片，打电游的，我只不过浪费了两个晚上的时间，就差点让自己陷入被动的局面了。不过以前可没有这么多课。Mole Onco还是瓦老师的课，竟然主动给出一天的时间复习，不过比起要求选最难啃的果子还要提前完成任务，Quiz前施加压力，这点好处就忽略不计了！
最高兴的还是Mutagenesis的细胞总算长出来了，也不知道是不是重新设计的partial complementary primers和增长了extension time起了作用，那天跑胶还是看不到带，心里就凉了一下，担心最坏的情况发生了—— Pfu Turbo Polymerase真的坏掉了！瓦老师肯定不会给我买新的，那这次又要像上次矿物油一样变成一桩冤案了。看到长出的三个Colony,虽然有点defused, 还是很兴奋呀！看来明天要做个miniprep了，希望不会让人失望呀！
那边CAT也有一些进展，这次的结果似乎表明过多的ATF3显然抑制了Kai1，瓦老师是这么认为的。我觉得很不放心，首先那两组ATF3的Renilla结果差的太远了，Transfection的效率一直就是个问题，如果不能把这个变量变成相对恒量，很难准确地分析数据。而且这次MG132和DMSO都没有结果，这是很奇怪的！同样的反应条件，除非Transfection效率太低了，可是DMSO不该是这样的，所以我怀疑transfection时加错了东西。瓦老师似乎对此不感兴趣，直接把它们忽略掉了。
最近实验都做得很郁闷，瓦老师根本不让我放开做实验，还要完全按照他的想法，改进mutagenesis的条件还是好不容易才说服他的。如果我能像Megumi那样自己做决定，说不定早就拿到data了。而且这样还严重影响了我的实验进度。可是怎么办呢？他是老板啊！
A ZA A ZA Fighting！ |
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